Feeling Broken? Confused? Down? Sad?

From this moment, when someone tells me they are feeling emotions that aren’t in the realm of “happy,” like sad, anxious or upset,  I’m going to say to them “That’s wonderful to hear! It shows you’re a human being capable of processing a wide range of emotions! This also means you will be feeling happy soon!” But many of us are impatient with our anxiety.

I’ve noticed many people seem to feel like they need to be “on,” as in “happy” should be the default setting. In the past, I didn’t like to share if I was feeling down because I didn’t want to “ruin the good moods of other people.” In turn, because of this decision, I wasn’t honoring myself with how I was feeling. I was also assuming everyone else was in a “good mood.” Some people might have slight variations of this, perhaps thinking “I don’t want to be a bother,” or “People are just going to think I’m being overly emotional or overdramatic.” But the results are the same; not fully honoring yourself and the feeling of whatever it is that’s making you “feel bad.”

This “feeling bad” is another misconception. What you feel, regardless of emotion is neither “bad” nor “good.” These words imply other connotations which in turn have been trapping many of us in these cyclical prisons, like what was mentioned earlier.

Emotions can be “pleasant” or “unpleasant,” but not “good” and definitely not”bad,” which inherently implies wrongness.  It isn’t wrong to feel anything. Granted, we might not enjoy the unpleasantness of some emotions, but it doesn’t mean they are wrong. But it means we are feeling a truth.

There is no “on” or “off” default setting for us and how we are feeling. This is why one day we may awaken to a bright sunshiney rainbow cat cuddling us from a sunbeam on a peaceful yet energetic wave of confidence that makes you think that today might just be the day you take over the world, while other days we may awaken to a gray numb cat screaming from a dead tree on a blaring and depressed wave of  frustration that makes us think today we will kill the first person who blinks in our general direction.

It’s ok to feel whatever you are feeling. Some days it might be unpleasant, but on those days you gotta roll with it as best you can. Allow it move through you. Allow yourself the space to feel why, without judgement. In asking why, we allow ourselves to see what is being reflected through and to us. In this lifetime, we often judge others based on how they are feeling, and we judge ourselves even more harshly. That is, I think our own ego and attachment of things impeding us from seeing as things are.

But, if you notice yourself feeling unpleasant emotions for an extended amount of time, like close to a month, that’s probably when you should think about talking to someone other than your closest friends and family.

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